Those of you who have been with WIFCaP from the beginning in 2011 and most of the following years of our TNR journey, know and love Mrs. Gray.
She is the heart of the organization. She and her little family of five were the ones that spurred me to dive into TNR and begin a quest to help community cats.
Pictures and stories of her and her sweet son, "Z" graced our Facebook page nearly every day for years. They along with Mr. Nelson were key to our engagement with our donors and supporters.
In 2016 when it I had retired from WIFCaP and began spending winters in Texas, it was impossible for the cats to stay on my porch. We were so happy when we found placement for Mrs. Gray and in turn, "Z"
Fans of the kitties inspired me to write a little book about Mrs. Grays life and so I did. At the end of the story, Mrs, Gray says: "So if a fairy tale is learning about love, caring, nurture and trust, then my life is a fairy tale, and for me, my life is a 'happily ever after' tale."
I wish that was the end of her story and that happily ever after was in fact the case. My hope for her was that she would grow old wrapped in a little circle of gray fur, with sweet dreams of the red porch swing and bringing me an occasional mouse as a gift.
Her story has taken an unforeseen turn. The family that took her in, in reality was not adopting her. They were hoping we would find permanent placement for her. I don't know how everything regarding that played out, in the form of agreements or plans, as I was no longer working with WIFCaP and not kept in the loop. I had several chances to visit Mrs. Gray and she seemed happy. It is a busy household with small grandchildren present and other foster animals. This is not something Mrs. Gray was used to, but things seemed fine.
In April of this year, I was contacted by a supporter asking how Mrs. Gray was doing. I asked and was informed that Mrs. Gray was no longer at April's. They had begun to allow her to go outside and one day, she didn't come back. The plan was to keep an eye out for her and once she presented herself, WIFCaP would take her in and find new placement for her. She has not been seen since late January.
I held on to hope that I would get a message that Mrs. Gray had returned. But when two days ago, another faithful supporter asked how she was doing. I feel it time to let her followers and fans know what is happening with her.
WIFCaP's response to the question on Facebook: "As far as we know, Mrs. Gray has moved to a different colony in April's neighborhood. The neighborhood has many generous feral cat feeders. The last time April saw her, she was fat and happy and her normal confident self. April has an eye out for her and when we see her again, we have plans to place her in a different home."
I can't really even put into words how I feel about this. We don't know where she is. We don't know if she is alive or dead. Is she being fed? In a few short months its winter again and she again will be outside on her own. Maybe someone took her in? So many questions.
I am sad and angry that this happened and there is nothing we can do.
I know rescues do the best they can for each and every animal they oversee. And when things happen that don't go the way they should, I always hope that note is taken, and new policies are put in place to prevent the same thing from happening again. Let's hope that has happened in this case.
WIFCaP has done a wonderful job with TNR but I feel like we failed Mrs. Gray. I take some of the blame for not keeping closer track of her. In my attempt to step back and allow Lois the freedom to run WIFCaP her way, I neglected Mrs. Gray and for that, I feel guilt. I own it and I ask God to forgive me.
My final words on this:
My sweet dear Mrs. Gray,
I am so sorry! My prayer is that you are fat and sassy, sleeping on someone else's front porch or better yet, inside on an overstuffed chair with a blankie all your own. I hope somehow you know how much I love you and that you know there are hundreds of others that love you too. I watched you rear your children all alone in a dank and dark basement of an abandoned house. I saw the fear in your eyes when we first met and watched those green eyes soften as you grew to trust and know that I would not hurt you. I promised to take care of you, and I failed. Please forgive me. Wait for me at
The Bridge, if that's where you are. You'll know my voice and you will see my tears of joy. I will know you by your velvet green eyes and your stubby little tail. What a happy reunion that will be. I just know there is a red swing there waiting for us to sit, share space and reminisce. And if by some miracle, you are alive and we find you, I WILL make sure you have a home.
